With pleasure, Team MocktailMommies welcomes Varad of LERT on board today. He is an aspiring Writer, Bookworm, Sun Tzu fan, Himalayas lover, Proud father and a Happy husband – not necessarily in that order. Over to you Varad...
Chennai
-!-!-!-!-!-
Chennai
Swanky office of a Multi-national e-commerce firm
July 2016
‘Where do you see yourselves ten years from
now?’
An irritated groan rippled through Shiv’s
mind even as he tried his level best not to roll his eyes.
‘Something funny?’ The interviewer
admittedly was sharp, Shiv conceded to himself.
‘Absolutely nothing, Sir. I was just
wondering why this is such an integral question to any interview. That’s all.’
‘You will get the answer to that question
when you are on this side of the table, my friend. Now, do you have an answer?’
‘Sure, Sir. In ten years, I see myself
happily married with two kids – a girl and a boy, in that order.’
Ha! Take that, smug interviewer!
‘I’m sorry?’
‘No need to be, Sir. It’s where I see
myself and I’m sure you would agree it isn’t such a bad place to be, wouldn’t
you?’
‘Definitely! But I guess you didn’t quite
get my question.’
Shiv shook his head, ‘Oh no! I sure did get
your question. Between you and me, we would have encountered this question a
few hundred times, yeah? What did you expect me to answer? The same run of the
mill blah-blah, loyal servant to my organization, blah, a true leader, blah,
epic motivator, crisis manager, etc… spiel? Or the cautiously arrogant – I see
myself in your seat spiel? I’m pretty sure you’d be bored and borderline
irritated listening to these answers, right? So, please allow me to stick to my
answer – happily married with two kids -
a girl and a boy, in that order. Oh! A sleek Mercedes wouldn’t be bad to
add to that picture.’
The interviewer smiled a nasty grin, ‘Thank
you Mr. Shiv Acharya. It’s been…interesting, to say the least.’
Shiv shrugged, ‘Good luck with your search,
Sir! I’ll leave you to your devices. Thank you.’
Mumbai
Coffee Day – Bandra
September 2016
‘So, Swapna! What do you look for in a
prospective candidate?’
Swapna sipped her Mocachillo slowly as she considered Priyank’s question. What did
she look for indeed? Definitely not random meetings in coffee shops after the
moms discussing their match through matrimony.com
on telephone for starters.
‘Well, Honesty definitely. A dishonest man
is not worth considering at all.’
‘Interesting! What else?’ Priyank slurped
his Fruity-bliss noisily, scaring few
mosquitos that dared venturing near their table.
Dude!
What’s with this interviewing?
‘Looks, dressing sense, empathy,
spontaneity …yeah’
‘What about prior experience? Would you rate
looks over that?’
‘What?’
‘What?’
‘I don’t follow, Priyank.’
‘You are a HR manager with Damageon, right?
I was asking about that…oh!’
‘Yeah! Sorry.’
‘No need, Swapna. I’m sure you’d have had
many interesting interviews, right?’
‘Yeah…I guess so!’
‘As a project manager, I face my share of
weird interviews as well. Few months ago, a guy answered that he sees himself
happily married with two kids - a girl
and a boy in that order when I asked him where does he see himself after ten
years...what’s funny?’
‘That was a brilliant reply, Priyank. If
he’s happily married with two kids after ten years, that means his career has
been sorted out, right?’
‘Well. He’s an idiot for not taking things
seriously.’
‘I’d have hired him!’
‘What? Really?’
‘Oops! Guess we both are looking for
different things, eh?’
‘I don’t follow, Swapna.’
‘Good luck, Priyank.’
Later
that evening…
Toto’s Garage pub, Bandra
‘Dude, seriously?’ Meeta guffawed spraying
beer everywhere, earning disgusted looks.
‘He started interviewing me yaar! I’m
pretty sure he would have asked for my salary breakup in the next five
minutes.’
That brought about another bout of laughter
from Meeta.
‘What do these guys look for before
accepting to marry someone? Seriously!’
‘Eh! Excuse me guys. Very sorry to
interrupt you two. Can I please get a seat at your table?’
Swapna cast an irritated glance at the
intruder. Just as she was about to say a rude ‘NO’, the guy flashed her a
disarming smile.
‘Please guys! I’m new to your city and a
single guy roaming around with a beer in a pub can raise suspicions. I have an
interview tomorrow and I don’t want to be taken to a Police Station tonight. I
promise I won’t overhear or butt into your discussion much.’
Meeta rolled her eyes and nodded, much to
Swapna’s chagrin.
‘Muchas Gracias, amigas! I’m Shiv.’
‘I’m Meeta and this is Swapna.’
‘So, what were you guys discussing? Oops,
bad one!’
‘Swaps, let’s hear a guy’s opinion on what
we were discussing, what say?’
‘Whatever!’
‘So, Shiv! Tell me, you are a prospective
groom meeting a girl for the first time. What would be the first things you’d
like to know about her?’
‘Well, two important things – 1. The speed at
which she usually keeps the fan running during the night and 2. The volume at
which she listens to music.’
‘What?’ Swapna turned her head so fast that
she almost sprained her neck.
‘Well, if my expectations match hers on
these two things, all other things would be just formality.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah! Life is very simple. Take care of
the little things that might cause a long term impact and the big things will
follow suit.’
‘Fair point,’ Swapna conceded.
‘Anyways, guys. Thank you very much for
your hospitality. I’ll take my leave now. Wish me luck?’
‘Don’t think you need any!’
‘I’ll drink to that. Cheers!’
The
next day…
Damageon
India Office
‘May I come in?’
‘Yes! Oh hi! Come on in. Do take a seat,
not that you have any issues joining random people in their tables.’
Shiv nodded at Swapna with a grin and took
his seat.
‘So, Shiv, where do you see yourselves in
ten years?’
‘Happily married with two kids - a girl and a boy, in that order.’
They smiled at each other.....
-!-!-!-!-!-
About Varad...
Varad is an accomplished blogger and businessman. He is a doting husband and father of two. He blogs at https://looseendoftheredthread.wordpress.com/ Along with his wife, Namratha, he has started #MicroMondays series. To know more about him, click here...
